[in the end, he doesn't want to be left in the dark about the people he cares about anymore, and of the list of people that mineo has deemed worth risking his life for - there is still only one person who he declared his loyalty to early. and the odd thing is this -
takeru had said without questioning that if mineo lost his own wish, takeru would have given up his own. if mineo had just found a way to reach him, then maybe he wouldn't have said yes. if there was even just a little bit more time.... he really does believe that it would have been different, because he wants to believe in all the good that takeru can do rather than the bad choices he'll make if he's left to his own devices.
he doesn't think that's delusional. mineo isn't the type of person who can fault someone for one mistake, no matter how monumental of a fuckup it is.
so he leans into takeru's hold, and turns his head just enough so that he can press his lips to his hair gently, like assuring him that it's okay. if he wants to hold onto mineo, then he isn't going anywhere.]
Okay.
[they still have more time before they have to unpack all of this
but even knowing how takeru felt before this, how he always commented on how people might be looking for mineo or how others would want his attention.... now more than ever - ]
.... there's nowhere else I'd rather be right now, Takeru. I promise.
[ that is a terrible decision on mineo's part, actually? please get better taste.
but he's quiet, and it's not really that surprising that he would prefer to shoo mineo out the door to deal with literally everything else that needs to be attended to. takeru really is not joking when he says that mineo is popular? and if this is their last night, then people will definitely be looking for him.
...
he'll move to get up, trying to get to his feet. he's still holding onto mineo, at least, so he's clearly not trying to run away at the moment. ]
You're going to end up hating me at this rate, you know.
[takeru is running a low fever if you don't think mineo's going to shove him into bed to rest then i don't know what to tell you.
but!
but this leads decently into that actually, because once takeru's back on his feet, mineo will go with him - just so that he can scoop him right up and bring him to the bed so that he can rest instead of staying on the floor. he'll deposit him gently enough, even if he doesn't go far himself once he's placed takeru down.]
... I think I'll only manage to hate you if you leave me behind for good. [ . . . well.] But I've also said that I won't forgive you if you make the choice to leave me.
You've done that but... now that you're still here, I suddenly don't know if I can hold a grudge forever. Kinda funny and stupid how that works out.
[so maybe it is only after he loses takeru, now that he's had him, that will cross a line that mineo won't be able to reconcile]
he's still here, for better or for worse, even if that fact wasn't really dependent on himself. but there's really no point in focusing on details like that-- for now. he'll think about it later, when things aren't that fresh and open.
[it's probably expected - there is probably a limit out there for the number of times you can let yourself be lied to and broken by the same person.
apparently mineo is willing to test it now, especially given that he thinks the main obstacle he has for takeru's attention will hopefully disappear tomorrow.
. . . but for now, he'll settle for laying beside him on the bed, running his fingers through his hair]
I don't.
[he's mad, but he thinks they both know that enough he doesn't have to say it. and right now the care wins out. they can talk about being mad after takeru has some time from what he did. that's the lucky thing, about being partners and knowing they're going home together]
... but I think there's also more people you need to face besides me. Even if it's not tonight.
[there are definitely enough people worried about takeru that mineo thinks he doesn't get to just run away]
it is very clear that he does not want to do this? with mineo he was basically forced, since he's going to have to deal with him when they get back home. but he thinks about vira, and harrow, and sheila especially, and everyone else, and it just...
takeru isn't quite sure how he got attached to so many people, and then he almost threw them away. ]
[ . . . . yeah. they really won't have much time here, will they? mineo looks at takeru for a long moment before he pulls away, just to get the medicine and water that he brought along. he offers the medicine out first, then the water bottle as he goes to sit back on the bed]
... what else are you thinking?
[since the first answer he got was an "I told you so"]
he thinks about how grace and mineo could have both revealed what happened in front of everyone. and he does, at least, understand why mineo didn't, so it's not as much of a surprise.
grace though? she was obviously angry, and she knew absolutely nothing about any of takeru's issues. so, it's... well. ]
Sheila-san mentioned it at the end - and there's some people who don't have needs for wishes anymore. Who knows, maybe they'll try to use one in order to let us see each other again.
Doesn't feel like there's much left that's impossible.
But wouldn't you regret it if you left them saying nothing?
Whether I regret it or not doesn't matter. I just don't think I can right now.
[ maybe in the future?
but, as of right now, takeru is just ready to never see them ever again. which probably won't give mineo a lot of confidence in takeru staying still, but it's honest. ]
I think that whether you regret something does matter. [a bit more firmly] I think you don't put nearly enough thought into whether or not you'll regret a decision before you make it.
[ because whether or not he'll regret it isn't what matters to takeru-- only the results. that's the problem, really. because now he is forced to face the consequences of his actions while surrounded by the people he chose to betray.
fleeing to adonis would be so much easier than any of this. ]
Of course it matters how you feel about something! Where the hell did you get the idea that it doesn't...?! You know you still have to sit with those and live the rest of your life with them, right?
[ well see, if he joined adonis, he is pretty sure he probably would either not live too long after he got his revenge or would have gotten his memory wiped. and he was okay with that.
so. ]
If you're going to dedicate yourself to something, you can't really concentrate on... everything else.
.... for someone so smart, you're such a fucking idiot sometimes.
[but - can he say that he's surprised?]
Then I'm making you think about it! We're going to solve X-Day, right? Get your revenge and then we'll meet in the office and go over the files for April and May.
I do need help, and I am going to rely on you. But I'm going to catch up so quick you won't know what happened, and then we'll deal with Adonis as a whole.
[but he will reach out then to take takeru's hand in one of his own]
And then after that, I'm still going to be counting on you.
[ he looks at their hands, and it's really far from the first time mineo has held him like this. takeru wonders when exactly this has become normal for them? he can't really recall anymore. ]
Do you think that you'll ever regret it? Choosing me.
[without even a second of hesitation. mineo has said for weeks now the same thing - that he chose his loyalties early, and he doesn't expect to ever regret doing so.
he sighs and then - he gave takeru medicine and gathered everything, so he can own up to being a little tired himself. he lets his head fall on the pillow next to takeru but continues to watch him]
But it's my promise that I'll make you regret it even worse next time if you don't choose me.
.... You're not the only one who can get greedy, you know?
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
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takeru had said without questioning that if mineo lost his own wish, takeru would have given up his own. if mineo had just found a way to reach him, then maybe he wouldn't have said yes. if there was even just a little bit more time.... he really does believe that it would have been different, because he wants to believe in all the good that takeru can do rather than the bad choices he'll make if he's left to his own devices.
he doesn't think that's delusional. mineo isn't the type of person who can fault someone for one mistake, no matter how monumental of a fuckup it is.
so he leans into takeru's hold, and turns his head just enough so that he can press his lips to his hair gently, like assuring him that it's okay. if he wants to hold onto mineo, then he isn't going anywhere.]
Okay.
[they still have more time before they have to unpack all of this
but even knowing how takeru felt before this, how he always commented on how people might be looking for mineo or how others would want his attention.... now more than ever - ]
.... there's nowhere else I'd rather be right now, Takeru. I promise.
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but he's quiet, and it's not really that surprising that he would prefer to shoo mineo out the door to deal with literally everything else that needs to be attended to. takeru really is not joking when he says that mineo is popular? and if this is their last night, then people will definitely be looking for him.
...
he'll move to get up, trying to get to his feet. he's still holding onto mineo, at least, so he's clearly not trying to run away at the moment. ]
You're going to end up hating me at this rate, you know.
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but!
but this leads decently into that actually, because once takeru's back on his feet, mineo will go with him - just so that he can scoop him right up and bring him to the bed so that he can rest instead of staying on the floor. he'll deposit him gently enough, even if he doesn't go far himself once he's placed takeru down.]
... I think I'll only manage to hate you if you leave me behind for good. [ . . . well.] But I've also said that I won't forgive you if you make the choice to leave me.
You've done that but... now that you're still here, I suddenly don't know if I can hold a grudge forever. Kinda funny and stupid how that works out.
[so maybe it is only after he loses takeru, now that he's had him, that will cross a line that mineo won't be able to reconcile]
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he's still here, for better or for worse, even if that fact wasn't really dependent on himself. but there's really no point in focusing on details like that-- for now. he'll think about it later, when things aren't that fresh and open.
... ]
I won't ever blame you if you decide to hate me.
[ it's more expected than anything. ]
But I won't fight you on it if you don't.
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apparently mineo is willing to test it now, especially given that he thinks the main obstacle he has for takeru's attention will hopefully disappear tomorrow.
. . . but for now, he'll settle for laying beside him on the bed, running his fingers through his hair]
I don't.
[he's mad, but he thinks they both know that enough he doesn't have to say it. and right now the care wins out. they can talk about being mad after takeru has some time from what he did. that's the lucky thing, about being partners and knowing they're going home together]
... but I think there's also more people you need to face besides me. Even if it's not tonight.
[there are definitely enough people worried about takeru that mineo thinks he doesn't get to just run away]
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it is very clear that he does not want to do this? with mineo he was basically forced, since he's going to have to deal with him when they get back home. but he thinks about vira, and harrow, and sheila especially, and everyone else, and it just...
takeru isn't quite sure how he got attached to so many people, and then he almost threw them away. ]
... mm.
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... what else are you thinking?
[since the first answer he got was an "I told you so"]
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he thinks about how grace and mineo could have both revealed what happened in front of everyone. and he does, at least, understand why mineo didn't, so it's not as much of a surprise.
grace though? she was obviously angry, and she knew absolutely nothing about any of takeru's issues. so, it's... well. ]
It's nothing.
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... you really still have the energy to lie to me, huh....
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he sighs, turning so that he's looking at the ceiling. ]
I don't know what else I can talk about.
How can I even talk to any of these people again?
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Sheila-san mentioned it at the end - and there's some people who don't have needs for wishes anymore. Who knows, maybe they'll try to use one in order to let us see each other again.
Doesn't feel like there's much left that's impossible.
But wouldn't you regret it if you left them saying nothing?
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[ maybe in the future?
but, as of right now, takeru is just ready to never see them ever again. which probably won't give mineo a lot of confidence in takeru staying still, but it's honest. ]
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I think that whether you regret something does matter. [a bit more firmly] I think you don't put nearly enough thought into whether or not you'll regret a decision before you make it.
[isn't that
literally what this is]
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fleeing to adonis would be so much easier than any of this. ]
I don't really care about how I'd feel about it.
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but there sure is an edge to mineo's voice at that.]
What do you mean you don't care?
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if mineo wants him to be honest. ]
It doesn't matter.
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so. ]
If you're going to dedicate yourself to something, you can't really concentrate on... everything else.
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[he frowns some more. it feels like he'd just asked this earlier but - ]
When your wish is granted tomorrow, and you don't have to dedicate yourself to it. Or if you could talk to everyone even once you leave this place.
Are you just going to keep ignoring how you feel about things?
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[ it sounds dismissive, but he means it, honestly. ]
If I'm honest, I didn't really think of what would happen after.
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[but - can he say that he's surprised?]
Then I'm making you think about it! We're going to solve X-Day, right? Get your revenge and then we'll meet in the office and go over the files for April and May.
I'm counting on you, you know?
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I already said I'm solving it. You're already way behind me, so you'll need help.
[ at the very least, in any ending where he doesn't join adonis, he planned to stay long enough to beat them.
it's just... after, that he's unsure of. ]
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[but he will reach out then to take takeru's hand in one of his own]
And then after that, I'm still going to be counting on you.
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Do you think that you'll ever regret it? Choosing me.
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[without even a second of hesitation. mineo has said for weeks now the same thing - that he chose his loyalties early, and he doesn't expect to ever regret doing so.
he sighs and then - he gave takeru medicine and gathered everything, so he can own up to being a little tired himself. he lets his head fall on the pillow next to takeru but continues to watch him]
But it's my promise that I'll make you regret it even worse next time if you don't choose me.
.... You're not the only one who can get greedy, you know?
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